It’s okay to stop the self-shaming. It’s not helping you be better, I promise. Sometimes you're in the shit, and that's totally fine. Scream, cry, stomp your feet. Feel the badness.
Biologically, emotions only last 90 seconds. You'll get through this. Let it out. Breathe through it. Dance or jiggle or shake or shout. And remember to love yourself exactly as you are, right now, big bad feelings and all.
Love the mess, the imperfect, and the unfinished. Wrap your arms around your failures and send some big fat adoration to all your flaws.
If you find a way to love and accept what exists right now, it’s the fastest way to free yourself from it, paving the way for growth.
It's magical when you discover you can be messy and still show up without shame. Instead of playing the game, see if you can change it.
You can be an imperfect human and still lead others. You can feel crappy and still be lovable. You can make mistakes, forgive yourself, and be forgiven.
You can even sleep on your own circadian rhythm no matter that some CEO wakes up at 4am or some genius does her best work by staying up all night.
Embracing your own flawed humanity and that of others without judgement might just be the ticket to creating rituals of connection. You may open up more space for play and creativity.
Guess, what? It’s possible to transform your badness into badassery. When you work with your feelings, you'll elevate quickly.
You can notice and name your feelings, then give yourself space to ask what information these feeling guides are giving you. Do you need to speak up or take action?
If you choose to embrace your messiness as a source of useful information you can unlock greater capacity to do what needs to be done.
You can shift from reactive, difficult moments back to equanimity and calm more quickly. You can set kind boundaries and own your choices.
Embrace the Cycle
There is no perfect pinnacle. When you realize you've grown and yet still remain messy, it's a humbling reminder you're human. It's a cycle, this messy human thing, so if we can learn to enjoy it, all the better.
You can accept the imperfection of human life to find a freer existence in a flawed state of happiness. Connect with the flow of things and revel in your messy, magic experience.
Each time you find yourself disconnected, shut down, or feeling down, it’s an opportunity to return, yet again, to find self acceptance, explore gentle shifts, and lean into playful connectivity.
I write about hard won lessons in my own life that you'll probably recognize.
I sprinkle in my fascination with psychology, brain science, leadership, emotions, and more.
My mind keeps getting blown when ancient wisdom and modern scientific findings converge.
So I write about that too.
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Get to Know Marisol
I'm a writer who believes in gentle personal growth. I love it when modern science and ancient spiritual practices intersect. I discovered the hard way we can't make real progress till we lovingly accept our reality today, warts and all.
Lots of people ask me if I'm actually messy. "You seem so on top of things," they'll say, and it's true, I am, some of the time. But I am also messy.
I have big, messy feelings that aren't always the pleasant ones. Sometimes I react emotionally, instead of responding mindfully, like I wish I would. I have a messy history, involving plenty of messy choices that upended my life many times.
Being messy is part of being human, so if, as you read this, you're thinking how at least you've got your shit together, welcome to Earth, traveler from afar.
with The Messy Human it's my goal to be your playful guide, inspiring your full transformative potential